I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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