They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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