So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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