he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize