Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
