1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
