I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
