Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
