no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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