Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I pour the whiskey from now on
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
