We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
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