Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Randomize
