Just fell off a train. Bad.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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