Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
