We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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