So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
