doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
