Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
