So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
