I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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