He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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