another moral hangover. fuck.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize