She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize