look no pants
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
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