Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet