Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
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thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
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