I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
