dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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