I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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