I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
