I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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