quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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