Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
My day in three words: secret purse cake
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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