Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
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