i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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