you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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