when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
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