I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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