blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Drake has all the answers
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
All I want is dick and wine.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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