sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
