and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Randomize
