who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
