Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.

(1-512): View more from Texas

Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply

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(512): I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all. (1-512): Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply http://tfl.nu/mzzt

Replies (7) Good night (798) Bad night (1436)
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(817): View more from Texas

what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?

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(817): what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!? http://tfl.nu/lfzq

Replies (9) Good night (4158) Bad night (828)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.

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(440): Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues. http://tfl.nu/5zyy

Replies (23) Good night (3639) Bad night (785)
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(352): View more from Florida

You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.

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(352): You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant. http://tfl.nu/vzqd

Replies (8) Good night (3694) Bad night (669)
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(419): View more from Ohio

I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?

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(419): I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included? http://tfl.nu/4lo3

Replies (17) Good night (5235) Bad night (1329)
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(214): View more from Texas

Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?

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(214): Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us? http://tfl.nu/e7z7

Replies (13) Good night (5306) Bad night (1554)
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(408): View more from California

You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.

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(408): You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed. http://tfl.nu/u516

Replies (7) Good night (1189) Bad night (2253)
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(519): View more from Ontario

i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.

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(519): i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying. http://tfl.nu/5e1o

Replies (5) Good night (823) Bad night (1314)
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(206): View more from Washington

You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.

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(206): You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want. http://tfl.nu/h1r5

Replies (5) Good night (716) Bad night (1502)
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(563): View more from Iowa

Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session

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(563): Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session http://tfl.nu/02xz

Replies (2) Good night (667) Bad night (1007)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Do you know how to give stiches?

(1-612): View more from Minnesota

I do not...this text concerns me

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(612): Do you know how to give stiches? (1-612): I do not...this text concerns me http://tfl.nu/8jm1

Replies (5) Good night (1820) Bad night (705)
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(848): View more from New Jersey

We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.

(848): View more from New Jersey

A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.

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(848): We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples. (848): A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck. http://tfl.nu/35ft

Replies (3) Good night (1559) Bad night (650)
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(317): View more from Indiana

I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....

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(317): I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong.... http://tfl.nu/btjr

Replies (2) Good night (589) Bad night (366)
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(574): View more from Indiana

I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.

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(574): I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me. http://tfl.nu/0sn3

Replies (1) Good night (316) Bad night (318)
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(231): View more from Michigan

Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.

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(231): Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP. http://tfl.nu/rqyr

Replies (2) Good night (158) Bad night (463)

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