She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Sacagawea was the original milf.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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