the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize
