I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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