I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
