before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize