Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
