sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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