I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
