I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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